April 11, 2007

Major League Woes

In case you didn't know, I became a baseball fan (well, an A's fan, to be more precise) during last year's play-offs. The fandom had been slowly growing ever since I went to a few A's games--and saw some games on TV; and heard some games on the radio; and sometimes saw the game on the TV and heard it on the radio (simultaneously) two summers ago. (Guess who I was living with!) But it really came into fruition the day I followed a game on ESPN.com, alone in my apartment, while wearing a rally hat and yelling at the cold computer screen. Suddenly, I was a Fan. And I had a few new crushes: Barry "Dreamboat" Zito (of course), Bobby Kielty (for the hair), and Nick Swisher (for the somehow gross-yet-alluring stoner quality). Well, and Houston Street is pretty cute too. In any case, I followed the play-off games and learned all kinds of fascinating facts about baseball and the team (but mostly about Dreamboat). Oh, and how I learned to love the LingO!

And then they lost! So sad. But I was looking forward to the next season 'cause, as you know, there's always next year . . .

But then--tragedy! Dreamboat left! (Yes, he deserves the money, but what about me?!) What was I to do? Follow him to the Giants--and that terrible orange color? Abandon all of my other junior Dreamies? But I couldn't leave Barry! He's 6'4"! He does yoga! He plays the guitar while surfing! (Well, something like that.) Oh, and he's a good pitcher.

So, anyway, now that the season has begun, I've decided that I must stay true to the A's. I check in on Dreamboat every once is a while, but it's so hard to see him in that drab uniform. And who cares about those other people walking around on the field with him? Unless Albert Pujols suddenly shows up on the Giants' roster, I will never be able to muster any more interest in that team. I do hope that Barry is happy there, though. And I sure hope he likes orange.

Anyway, the point of this post is just a lamentation over the loss of Dreamboat. I still have faith in the A's. And I'll keep wearing my rally hat! (Until they move to Fremont. Then I'll spend my days hatless, crying over times gone by--and for all of the dreamboats I once loved.)

April 03, 2007

Alanis, Fergie, or Jennifer Love Hewitt?

My supercool and awesome friend Gaby sent me this link to a crazy video on YouTube. You need to watch it now! And then tell me: Is Alanis making fun of herself or Fergie? I can't really tell. And, weirder still, I hope Alanis is making fun of herself because I'm feeling very protective of Fergie these days. Ever since I learned all of the words to "London Bridge" for a karaoke party a little while ago, I've had a soft spot for Fergie. I think it's her unabashed embrace of the nonsensical that has endeared her to me. (Or the fact that her case of swamp ass just might rival mine! I don't believe that "peed her pants" theory--also thanks to Gaby.) I do NOT like the Black Eyed Peas with Fergie, though. I don't know why. Well, I have an idea why, which has to do with a little song that some of us may know as "Let's Get It Started." But that was still Fergie. So, who knows how my mind works? Anyway . . .

Also on the topic of Fergie, I submit that she and Gwen Stefani are actually very similar. Some may say that Fergie is a bad imitation of Gwen, but I'm not sure that it's so one-way. Thoughts?